“Embracing the New Year with Grace in Grief ”

This change, this “new normal” was not something you chose or wanted.

As the old year fades and the holiday season is behind you, it’s not uncommon for a sudden surge of fear about the unknown to take hold. This change—this “new normal”—is likely not something you chose or wanted, and it’s okay to feel resentful about it.

Grief can feel heavy and unrelenting, but leaning into it, allowing yourself the space to feel and heal, will, in time, guide you toward acceptance. One day, you may find yourself surprised by moments of meaningful growth and renewed purpose emerging from the pain.

On a personal note, I remember the early days when I was simply “going through the motions”—handling responsibilities, attending events, and volunteering. But each evening, I made it a point to sit with my grief. I allowed myself to cry, to mourn, and to reflect on the blessings I had experienced in those 20 years. Gratitude became my anchor, reminding me that the life I lived was worth every moment of pain I had to endure after it changed. Acceptance didn’t come easily—it wasn’t something I wanted; it was something I needed.

Just as grief is deeply personal, acts of mourning are unique to each of us. There is no “right way” to grieve, but it’s important to remember that you don’t have to do it alone. Seek out people who can hold space for your story, who will support you without judgment. Healing isn’t about forgetting—it’s about finding a way forward while honoring the love and the loss that shaped you.

Coping with Mindfulness:

Using mindfulness to cope with grief is not intended to diminish or eliminate the pain but instead acknowledge the pain. It can take more energy to avoid grief than to let ourselves experience it.

Relaxation Technique

You start lying down, take a few deep breaths while visualizing your peaceful place. (A quiet beach, with the warmth of the sun wrapping my body works for me). Take a breath and squeeze one group of muscles. Perhaps start with your feet. Hold for five to 10 seconds. As you breathe out, relax those muscles for 10 to 20 seconds. Now move on to the next muscle group. Repeat until you’ve hit most of the muscles in your body. 

You deserve calm.

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